How Gay Is Michael Callahan?

Michael Callahan’s email address:
zzyygott@yahoo.com
Write him and let him know how gay he is.

Mystery Date by Michael Callahan

Mystery Date

A tape w/ 5 songs was given to me by a narcoleptic homosexual bipolar psychotic (you readers of Modus who know Steven Purkey know what I’m sayin’), a McMeat who’s “Shitty Reviews” have made me sadly and painfully aware of the fact that he has absolutely NO TASTE in music whatsoever. (But he’s real nice.)  And his wonderful and very sweet wife Kelli who I couldn’t agree with more Re: Sonic Youth, to review and comment on.

–Michael Callahan

P.S.  Steve’s not really gay???

Track One: The Flaming Lips “Jesus Shooting Heroin”

I’ve heard this before?  A thousand stars!!!  I fucking love it!  I’d buy it if I knew who the fuck it was.  I’d love to have the vocalist’s babies.  Opens all dreamy like, then BAM!!!  Jesus takes a big goddamn bite right outta yer head.  Then the rush, right back to dreamy land…If you have any taste at all in music get some o’ this!

Track Two: Regina Spektor “That Time”

This is fuckin’ cool.  I need more more more!  The lyrics are well placed all through the song and her smoky bourbon voice is sweet on the nerves.  Especially the OD on heroin lines.

Track Three: Thunderslut “Get My Thrill”

Suck Ass Fuck No Shut Up Eat Dead Things!  Sounds like every other shit bag garage band I’ve ever heard.  The lyrics can’t even be called “weak.”  It’s causing me much physical pain.  Stop it.

Track Four: The Polyphonic Spree “Lithium”

These guys are fucking great.  One of the best covers I’ve ever heard.  I’d love to find more!  Tell me they do other covers.  Way unique…wow.

Track Five: Julee Cruise “I Float Alone”

This is definitely my kind of music.  The vocalist’s ethereal quality and range are very sedating while parts of the music are mildly discordant at the right moments.  Very nice!

Lick Me Where I Pee by Michael Callahan

Today’s plastic generation is full of super synthetic high-tech rubber reproducted ultra-plasticized fake remake latex epoxy resonated lead-filled ink-infested rambo barbie snoopnig pamela big fake boob puffy lip bitch fucking dolls.